The Junkyard Awakens

There was an impromptu mass-starting of all of the rotting cars in driveways a few minutes ago that seems to have taken the attention away from any trailer tipping.  For the ones that could find their way in to gear there was also a subsequent burnout contest.  Not since the Exxon Valdez has such an oil spill been witnessed, I swear to you.  The oil slicks actually help make for some impressively smoky burnouts.  Unfortunately, there are also quite a few puddles of urine and vomit which don’t mix as gracefully with the smell of burning rubber.  What’s more, when the vehicles deplete their years old gas, break down or can no longer be manipulated by their drunken operators, they are being abandoned randomly wherever they come to rest.  I fear that my chances of a vehicular retreat or rescue later are quickly dwindling as the streets get more and more littered with abandoned project cars and trucks.  I am in genuine fear for my little import sitting helplessly in the driveway.  I’ve so far been able to ward off any would be car pirates by telling them that it’s a hybrid that hasn’t been plugged in all day so it couldn’t run anyway.  After some perplexed looks and an occasional questioning of my sexuality, they are so far wandering off and resuming their searches for a more domestic build of candidate for their felonious urges.